


a single day dragging an apocalypse of days

by girlmarauders



Category: Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate
Genre: F/M, Female Friendship, Gen, Misses Clause Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-22
Updated: 2013-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-05 15:24:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1095607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girlmarauders/pseuds/girlmarauders
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rachel and Cassie are friends. Rachel is in love. Everyone is at war. Nothing is simple. </p><p>Title from "In Saadi Shirazi’s Garden (When He Was a Prisoner)" by Sargon Boulus</p>
            </blockquote>





	a single day dragging an apocalypse of days

**Author's Note:**

  * For [redcandle17](https://archiveofourown.org/users/redcandle17/gifts).



 

“C’mon Cassie, you’ve really never thought about your dream wedding? Seriously?” Rachel says, throwing clothes from the thift bin over her arm. Cassie rolls her eyes but follows Rachel to the back of the store and the changing rooms.

“It’s never really come up,” Cassie says, taking the clothes Rachel passes her through the curtain without thinking about it.

Rachel laughs.

“Don’t tell Jake that, he’ll take it as a challenge and you’ll have a proposal before the week is over.” She says, accompanied by the rustling of clothing. Cassie feels herself blush violently and also smile, which she quickly covers with her free hand.

“I’ll try and remember,” Cassie says drily.

“I can hear you smiling,” Rachel says, sticking her arm out of the curtain and gestures for one of the shirts Cassie is holding. “You are totally imagining you and Jake’s wedding right now, I know you are.”

“I am not!” Cassie says loudly and then covers her mouth again when the shop assistant turns to stare at her. She can hear Rachel laughing hysterically from inside the booth.

<As much as I hate to interrupt what I imagine is a fascinating and fun-filled shopping trip, Jake told me to come get you guys.> Tobias says dryly in their minds. He sounds faint, like he’s hovering just at the edge of all their ranges. Rachel stops laughing and Cassie can hear the sounds of her changing. When she pulls back the curtain, she’s dressed in her jeans and nice shirt again, with her “I am calm and having a great time” smile plastered on. The shop assistant hustles over to simper. Rachel smiles at her emptily and passes her a few tops.

“I think I’ll get these,” she says, keeping only two and striding to the cash register. Cassie passes the shirts she’s holding to the assistant and rushes to catch up with her. By the time she’s caught up with Rachel, the person at the register is already putting her clothes into a paper bag.

“Have a nice day now,” the woman says and Rachel smiles back while Cassie struggles to muster one of her own.

“You too,” Rachel says and swishes out of the store, shopping bags hanging from her arms.

“Cassie, how are you getting home?” She asks, when they’re walking past the pretzel store on the way out.

“I’m taking the bus,” Cassie shrugs. They both have acting casual about their plans down to an art form.

“Why don’t I drive you? It’s faster.” Rachel says, as they step into the hot parking lot.

“No, it’s alright, I know you have to swing by Tobe’s place,” Cassie says, with a quick smile. Rachel shoots her an annoyed look but bumps her shoulder.

“See you later then.”

&&&

Rachel speedwalks to her car and throws her shopping inside, under the back seat. It’ll be fine in the parking lot until she can come back later and get it. She’s already given her keys to Cassie when they parted ways, checking to see if anyone was watching them. Every week their movements become even more fraught with danger. Cassie takes three buses home instead of the one she needs, to throw anyone off of where she’s really going. Jake and Marco walk different ways home every day, sometimes together and sometimes apart. It would be paranoid but as Marco always says, it’s not paranoia if they’re really out to get you.

She looks around. The parking lot is empty but it’s better not to risk it. There’s a shape moving in the sky and she sees a bird land on a telegraph pole at the edge of the parking lot.

<Hey> She hears Tobe inside her mind. She wants to wave or even lift her hand but if someone, a Yeerk, sees her waving and talking to a bird she’ll be dead or worse before you can say “crazy lady”.

“I’m coming,” she whispers. She knows he can’t hear her, Tobe’s hearing is terrible, but he might be able to see her and he’s gotten better at reading lips.

She locks the car from the inside and closes the door, turning away from Tobias and walking towards the alley that cut away from the parking lot. There’s some dumpsters she can morph behind.

She checks around herself before she ducks behind the dumpsters. Quickly and efficiently, doing her best to avoid touching the dumpsters or the ground too much, she strips off her layers of clothing and stuffs them into a plastic bag, which she ties and sticks behind one of the dumpsters. Hopefully a homeless person won’t find it. She starts morphing as fast as she can, aware she could be found and caught at any moment. Jake’ll kill her when he finds out what she’s doing but she doesn’t care. She must balance her fear and care against the joy of talking to Tobias without barriers, the feeling of air under her wings.

The morph is complete within moments and she fluffs her feathers. This morph is personal, not even Cassie knows she has it. A female red-tailed hawk from near Tobias’ territory, although far enough that Rachel’s unlikely to run into her while in morph.

She flaps her wings and pushes upwards, straining to fly. She flaps uselessly for a bit until she finds some warm air over the parking lot and soars upwards. She can hear Tobe laughing in her mind.

<You look ridiculous> he says. <Like a chicken.>

<You’re awful> she says but she’s happy. She likes when Tobe is human and can kiss her with human lips but there’s something about talking to him when neither of them are worried about looking good. It sounds ridiculous but there’s something freeing about being birds.

She dreams, sometimes, that she forgets to change back and she stays a hawk forever. She dreams that her and Tobias live together on his territory, where there is no war. She dreams of life as a bird for the rest of her days.

<Missed this> she says, when she finally catches a good enough thermal to take her high enough.

<Missed you> Tobias says, rising on a thermal above her. She wishes she had a mouth to smile with.

<Where are we going? Straight to Cassie’s?>

Tobe banks left up ahead of her and she resists the urge to follow. Hawks, even mating pairs, don’t follow each other like ants.

<Jake called a meeting. He and Marco are on their way. Ax is there already.> He says. <but we can take the scenic route.>

Rachel banks, feeling the air ruffle over her feathers.

<Scenic how?>

<Race you to the mountain?> He says, flapping hard and rising onto another thermal.

<Cheater!> She shouts, and banks again, searching for a better thermal. They soar around each other, teasing and showing off, the whole way to Tobias’ territory. She doesn’t worry about being spotted because she knows they look exactly like what they are: a mating pair playing games. Red-tailed hawks mate for life.

She watches from his tree while Tobe does his normal fly-through, circling his territory and clawing at trees with talons and beak to mark it. They all have the responsibilities they set themselves at home. Rachel makes her family believe she’s always been blonde and careless. Marco navigates his father. Cassie has her family and her animals. Jake tortures himself over Tom.  
Tobe makes sure other birds don’t steal his territory. She can’t say her boyfriend’s boring.

They follow the thermals down the mountain, watching smaller rodents scurry away at the sound of their coming. Cassie’s house is on the edge of the woods, surrounded by open pasture and farmland. It makes Rachel’s hindbrain nervous, the openness and lack of trees. No place for a hawk to hide or sneak up on prey. Ahead of her Tobe dips a wing and perches at the top of one of the last trees.

<Get over here,> he says, and she pulls up her wings, using her momentum to land next to him. He shuffles over, in the awkward way hawks do, and preens her with his razor-sharp beak, ruffling her feathers and then smoothing them back down again. It’s an enjoyable feeling, if an odd one that she can’t compare to any human experience. The breeze ruffles the leaves around them and Tobe buts her with the top of his head, gently, but pushing off the branch. He flaps twice and then catches a breeze of hot air and soars forward, the deep red of his tail feathers clear to see.

&&&

Cassie hears Rachel and Tobias coming before she sees them: the flapping of wings and Tobe’s distinctive hawk screech. They swoop in, one right after the other, Tobias, the smaller, flying up into the rafters. Rachel, the worse flyer, just lands on the floor and hops around awkwardly, looking up to where Cassie’s sitting on the barrier of one of the horse’s stalls. She rolls her eyes.

“I put some clothes for you in the stall,” Cassie says, pointing at the stall behind Rachel. She opens her beak and trills at her.

<Thanks> She says and hops awkwardly into the stall, flapping ridiculously.

<You look really stupid.> Tobe says.

<Don’t you watch me, Peeping Tom> She snaps back and Tobe laughs.

<You want me to turn around? It’s not like Hawk-O-Vision, I can’t turn it off>

Cassie laughs and can hear Rachel’s laugh in her mind until it’s replaced by the odd sounds of a morph. There’s the sound of rustling as Rachel slips into her clothes.

“Why’s Jake called a meeting? Are he and Marco here yet?” Rachel says, sticking her head over the door of the horse stall and running her fingers through her hair.

“They should be here soon. He couldn’t say anything over the phone.” Cassie shrugs.

<Ax just thought-spoke me. He’s coming in.>

Cassie jumps off the stable door.

“Is he in morph? My parents are in the house!”

Answering her question, Ax’s human morph walks through the open barn door.

“I am not in morph! I remembered Jake’s instructions about being a secret!”

Cassie lets outs a massive breath.

“Thank god.”

Rachel steps out of the stall and puts a hand on Cassie’s shoulder. Cassie looks up at her and smiles.

“Thanks for being careful Ax,” Rachel says, tightening her fingers on Cassie’s shoulder and then releasing.

There’s a quick knock at the door post of the barn and Jake steps around it, Marco close behind him. Marco gives everyone a lazy ironic salute.

“Stand to attention everyone, fearless leader’s in the room.”

Rachel rolls her eyes. Ax gives a kind of spasming motion, like he’s trying to stand to attention but he’s not sure what that means.

“Cassie, queen of all animals. Xena, warrior princess, you look stunning, radiant as usual. Except you’re missing something.” Marco puts finger on his chin, posing overdramatically. “What could it be?”

Rachel fixes him with a bored look and Tobe screeches, as quietly as a hawk is able, from the rafters.

Marco comes out of his pose and fixes Rachel with one of his trademark shit-eating grins.

“Oh yeah, the blood of your enemies. You’re so cleaned up, it looks like you’ve never seen a battlefield.”

Rachel and Jake roll their eyes at the same moment and Cassie blinks. It’s easy to forget they’re related sometimes but they look nearly identical for a second of exasperation.

“Okay,” Jake says, stepping over the lean on the stable wall next to Cassie. He reaches down to brush her shoulder, casually offering a little bit of comfort in a way that won’t make the rest of the group notice. “Marco and Tobias have been working on scouting out landing locations for Yeerk transport ships. Thanks to Ax, we know they have to regularly restock their pools with certain nutrients they can’t get on Earth or they’ll die, so we’ve been looking for the places where these ships come down. We think if we can take out one or two of these ships and stop them from transporting their cargo, some pools will go hungry and, hopefully, have to lessen their populations.”

Cassie sees Rachel shoot a look upwards, towards Tobias. They all know that Jake sometimes asks them to do things, scouting missions or intelligence gathering, without telling the others, but it doesn’t make them comfortable. Tobe does it more than any of them. He’s doesn’t have the same responsibilities as the others and he’s careful and quiet in a way that Ax simply isn’t.

“Lessen their populations?” Cassie asks. “What does that mean?”

Jake nods at Ax.

“Take it away Ax-man.”

Ax nods, although, like most human gestures on him while in morph, it looks strange and forced.

“Yeerk pools control their population levels very carefully, usually by monitoring who is allowed to enter and who gains a host. However, in case of disease or a sudden drop in nutrient levels that cannot be remedied, Yeerk visser’s have been known to cull their pools.”

“Cull?” Cassie says, twitching. She can see Rachel smiling vaguely. “They kill their own?”

Ax nods again.

“Yeerks do not care if their own kind die, especially if it will keep the higher ranking Yeerks alive. If we prevent enough ships from delivering their cargo, Yeerks, even the higher-ranking Vissers, will die.”

Cassie watches Rachel’s smile grow.

“We can starve ‘em out.” She says.

“Doesn’t that feel a little…cruel?” Cassie asks. “When we fight them, they can at least fight back. Sometimes we lose, sometimes we win. But we’re just going to take their food away and wait for them to starve? And Ax, what happens to a host, to the human host, when the Yeerk starves?”

Ax makes a strange, aborted attempt at a human shrug.

“I have never seen or heard of a Yeerk starving inside of a human. But there were records of Hork-Bajir rebels capturing Yeerk-invested Hork-Bajir and holding them captive until the Yeerk starved.”

<And what happened to them?> Tobias asks, his thought-speech reaching everyone.

Ax moves his head strangely when he looks up, trying to find Tobias in the rafters, and it takes Cassie a second to realise he must be trying to compensate for his missing eyes.

“Some of them died, friend.” Ax says, and he sounds genuinely grieved for those dead Hork-Bajir. She thinks, for all of them, every dead Hork-Bajir saddens them more than any other creature they kill in the name of fighting the Yeerks. Tobias especially, but all of them have friends among the fledgling Hork-Bajir colony in the mountains and Cassie’s heart weeps at the story of how the Hork-Bajir were taken by the Yeerks. “But some of them lived. It depends on the Yeerk. Some of them used their last moments to kill their host. Some of them surrendered and died, leaving the host alive.”

“So, starving Yeerks means dead humans. It means some people will die.”

Jake rests his hand on Cassie’s shoulder and presses.

“Cassie, some people have already died. A lot of people have already died.” Jake says and he uses the voice Cassie recognises. It isn’t the voice of a boy she’s been on dates with or kissed, it isn’t the voice of a friend. It’s the voice of her leader, her commander, who makes difficult decisions and has to live with them. The leader who balances Marco’s plans and Rachel’s blood-thirstiness with Tobe’s doubt and her sympathy.

She isn’t weak. She never lets herself believe she’s weak because she doesn’t want to kill. She can’t.

“Tobias and Marco have identified three different locations that may be landing and transport locations for the pool nutrients. It might be only one of them is or maybe all three of them. I’m proposing we monitor the locations, figure out whether they are the landing sights and try to identify any weaknesses so that we can get in and stop those nutrients getting to where they’re going.”

“I want a vote.” Cassie says. Marco looks at her funnily, the line forming between his eyebrow he gets when he’s trying to figure out a specific problem.

“It’s a good plan Cassie,” he says. “One of our less stupid ones, if I do say so myself.”

<I second Cassie, we should vote. We always vote.> Tobias says, flapping down from the rafter slowly to perch on one of the stable doors.

“Alright,” Jake says easily. “Everyone in favour of targeting the landing locations, raise your hand.”

Rachel raises her hand.

“Starve the assholes out.” She says, with a bloodthirsty grin. “Maybe take a few down in the attack.”

Marco raises his hand, as does Jake. Ax slowly raises his hand, looking at Jake as he does it.

“My commander once said that sometimes war calls for battles without honour.” Ax says, turning to look at Cassie. “I am sorry when people die but the Yeerks kill and do not feel sorry.”

Tobe ruffles his feathers and scratches at the stable door with his talons.

<I vote in favour> he says, although he sounds annoyed about it.

Cassie shrugs and looks at her hands.

“I’m not happy about it but I’ll follow the vote.” She says. Jake nods.

“Ax, Tobias, come outside and you and Marco can talk about starting watching the locations. We’ll get the rest of us in on it when the weekend starts.” He says, and nods at the door. Jake pulls off his sweater and wraps it round his arm. “Tobe?” He say, holding it up so Tobias can hop from the stable door onto his arm. Jake winces and adjusts the wrap until Tobe’s talons are no longer digging into his arm.

When the boys are out of the barn and hopefully suitable distance away, Rachel steps over to give Cassie a quick hug.

“Sorry for voting against you,” She says quickly. Cassie smiles bravely and pats Rachel’s arm when they pull apart.

“It’s okay. You’re right. You and Jake are right. People are already dying and I shouldn’t feel bad about killing Yeerks. I just do.”

Rachel leans against the stable wall and sighs.

“I wish I could feel the way you do Cassie, feel sorry for all the people dying and the families who lose their brothers and sisters to Yeerks before they even died. But I can’t feel sorry for every person that dies or is hurt in this war. I wish I could. But I just don’t.”

Cassie reaches out, takes Rachel’s hand and squeezes.

 


End file.
